Читать книгу 📗 "The memoirs of a Russian schoolboy (СИ) - Нигматулин Марат "Московский школьник""
Oh, I'll fall asleep forever now.
[Russian text:
Я домой иду – праздник кончился.
Едва ноги несут, весь я сгорбился,
По дороге иду после праздника,
Под руку с женой я лабазника.
И слова все выходят нескладные,
И конфеты во мне шоколадные.
И кроссовки расползлись безупречные,
Ой, засну я сейчас на веки вечные.]
So, to begin with, I would like to explain how Tonya could have occupied the school building for almost all vacations without much effort for her festivities, since this reader is probably most interested. Everything was very simple: on the second day of the holidays, acting in the deep twilight, a detachment of slaves Tony crept in, neutralizing the guard, who had just fallen asleep in his cubicle, locking it in from outside, previously depriving him of all communication possibilities with the outside world. Then the slaves brought all the necessary food to the school, after which the building was already occupied by the guests, after which the feast began, which did notstop for almost a whole week. Boys and girls for a whole week devoured a variety of delicacies, only a little interrupted by a dream, after which gluttony was renewed with much greater force, which was accompanied by constant communication on vulgar topics and singing songs. There was also a rather strange entertainment, which I met, however, quite often: boys and girls undressed to underwear, and then began to demonstrate to all around the dignities and shortcomings of theirbody (much more often flaws). When the great holiday ended, and it happened a couple of days before the start of the new quarter, everyone was sent home to put themselves in order by the beginning of the working week, which was very difficult for many. Some, like Julia Avvakumova, were engaged in physical exercises, others indulged in washing the stomach, like Sonia Barnash, walking on fresh, as did Tonya.
Chapter fiveteen.
The drunkenness.
How often some ignorant people like to say that in Russia they drink a lot of wine, although the majority of the population consumes the latter only relatively little, while a few drink, on the contrary, very much, which, when compiling general statistics, becomes invisible or unobtrusive, but remains very important. To the few people from whom alcoholics and fornicators in our country originate, I entirely refer to school and university teachers, of which I knew even many teetotalers, but many others were great drinkers and snacks, which at that Let time not be an insult to them and a humiliation of their professional honor. Snezhana Vladimirovna, who taught us the Russian language, was a great harlot, a glutton and a drunkard who, in appropriate ways, brought up three of her children, one with whom I had a conflict, as well as many other children in our school, to whom she was a teacher. In a word, I now would prefer to talk about the prosperity of drunkenness among many schoolchildren, who, listening to the stories of ignorant Snezhana Vladimirovna, believed that «from one glass of vodka a week nothing will be wrong». She gladly told us about how she liked to drink into a beastly condition in her student years, leading herself to such a thing, when a little more, and even signs of life will not be. «I always liked to drink. And in my student years I got drunk so that there was no sign of life. But you, girls, do not do this yet. At your age, I sometimes drank a bottle of dry wine with a girlfriend. That will help you. One or two times a week. And in three years you will be able to drink cognac, and vodka!» – Snezhana Vladimirovna told us.
But classmates drank quite a lot, and the older they got, the worse it was, but basically nothing much did not change much, except for the fact that after the government tightened the laws on the sale of wines and vodkas, and strengthened supervision for traders, which came after power-conscious men learned about the disasters in the system of public education, the school began to revive the traditions of handicraft production of ethyl alcohol with the help of various distillers. Antonina, which I mentioned already many times over, organized by her own slaves the business of underground production of various drinks, the most popular of which was called «Egyptian Rum «Mummy»: I'm coming to you», a red liquid with a very pronounced smell of incomprehensible herbs and cologne that was added there, as well as abundant sediment that was sold in glass bottles with a label where an ugly Egyptian mummy was depicted to the extreme. Alcohol was produced in country cottages owned by the parents of Antonina's slaves, where in various basements and sheds he was made on an almost industrial scale, bringing production to 434 liters a week soon, if we sum up the achievement of all our distilling slaves. Alcohol insisted on cherries, various berries, herbs and fruits, resulting in a variety of very bad smell drinks, but I can not judge their taste as a teetotaler, which were then sold for good money to other schoolchildren, often from other provinces of the Republic, through Internet or through a network of «secret stores».
To many more teachers, we were loved by the inspectors who were previously teachers and appointed to these positions for such faults at work, which could not be dismissed, although the clarity of the impossibility of furtherwork with children was clear; first of all, it was drunkenness at work. The saying said that «the examiner is a former bad teacher», being absolutely correct here, because it was from those who drank or were stupid and often combining both these qualities that the horde of these incomprehensible people was recruited, which in the opinion of the teachers and schoolchildren themselves were complete loafers, which was very close to the truth in order to voice this. The examiner appeared at the school about once a week to «check the implementation of existing legal acts», which in fact meant a situation when he came to a teacher's room where he was treated to a variety of delicacies, wines and vodka that were invariably bought for money collected from the parents of students as donations, and after leaving, reporting that all the school affairs in the most complete order. «Odor vocatus – censorem euntibus» – says another school proverb, which also accurately conveys the essence of this particular post, since the examiner, who had very little work daily, only being forced to go to schools for their verification, and then to run into the administration for announcements of the situation in them, which provided for his employment only for a few hours a week, while giving a good salary, and therefore left the possibility of free drinking. They fell in the composition of inspectors and persons, work not only with children, but in general with human beings contrary to certain characteristics of character, and, more simply, the most outspoken crazy in the worst sense of the term, often inclined towards what the Latins called the Greek word coprolalia, and therefore especially funny. Once there was a case when slaves were obliged to bring in a gift to a very prominent inspector in the form of a gift a huge bottle filled with homemade vodka tincture released under the patronage of the blessed Antonina; one slave said then that he was ready to argue – the inspector would die from this bottle, while the other said that he would not even get blind from it; their dispute was resolved in favor of the former, since methanol proved too strong for the official's body.
Chapter sixteen.
Confidential shops.
